Dejan's Journal: Rainfall

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Null Winter
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Joined: Sat Oct 25, 2014 5:26 pm

Dejan's Journal: Rainfall

Post by Null Winter » Wed Nov 26, 2014 3:35 am

Dejan's footsteps were slow and measured. He winced every time he cracked a twig beneath his feet, and paused after each snap to make certain that he had not been heard. Evening light filtered down through the oppressive trees. As far as he knew, he was the only living thing here right now. Soon enough he realized that he was lost despite his best efforts at pathfinding. He reached into his pocket to extract his crude map of the area. A grimy finger followed a line on the chart from his departure point, a destroyed shrine, to his hideout. They were not that far apart, yet he had somehow gone astray.

A splotch on the paper drew his attention. He did not recall that being there before... Another splotch appeared near it. With a start, he looked up at the sky. Dark clouds were quickly rolling in to blot out the weak sun. Water began to pour forth from the heavens. He stuffed his map away, pulled his wood axe from its holster, and adjusted his hat low over his head to keep the rain out of his eyes. The fury of the storm grew as he ran in a random direction and prayed to see some sort of shelter. There was no wind, but the water and clouds hung oppressively over him as if the weather itself wanted to drown him.

He ran for hours. There was no light. Nothing looked familiar. His breath caught in his throat while he gasped for breath. The trees seemed to close in on him as rain pounded the earth. Just when Dejan considered using the last battery for his flashlight, something made him freeze. In the space between two trees, he saw a blue glow. His hair stood on end as a bony hand reached from behind the tree, and grasped the bark. The thing it was attached to soon followed. A skeletal figure clad in torn, once white robes pulled past the obstruction, and swung its gaze at the ground. Twin cones of an unearthly blue light emanated from where its eyes should be, but it possessed only a slimy skull. It lurched forward under the weight of a black casket chained to its back by iron shackles that were connected to its exposed spine. Water sloshed out of the cracked container, and the liquid glowed on the ground with the same unnatural light as its eyes but brighter.

His fingers clenched onto the handle of his axe. Dejan prepared himself for a fight yet... the creature seemed utterly uninterested in him. It merely searched the ground for something unknown to him. He dared not venture closer to it to get a closer look. It shambled forward more, and left a trail of the glowing water behind it. The water itself looked like liquid moonlight to Dejan. The beast stumbled around in an uncertain circle. He caught a glimpse of a corroded rosary dangling from a silver chain on its throat.

Dejan began to quietly move away from the aquatic specter. He turned around and bumped directly off a horror that he was all too familiar with. One of the horrifically deformed monsters that he had dubbed as a "Chomper" gurgled and screeched at him. Wet ground squelched beneath his feet after he leapt back to dodge its snapping jaws. Trees and foliage prevented his escape to the rear, and the Chomper blocked where he had come from. The only path open to him was to run right past the unknown specter. He took the obvious option.

Wet moss clung to his legs as he sprinted towards where the watery creature had come from. He could hear the hungry beast that he was more worried about giving chase behind him. The splotch of spilled, luminescent water was right in front of him. He leaped over it, and cried out in pain as an intense burning sensation covered his entire body. It ended as soon as he was no longer over the water, but a dull throb of pain remained. Dejan spun back to face the Chomper, assuming he had been harmed in some fashion by it. Instead, the creature stood on the other side of the slick trail. It was obviously agitated; it paced back and forth while swinging its fists and snapping its gory jaws. However, it did not step over the trail.

Dejan looked at his arms, and immediately wished he had not. He struggled to hold down the bread he had eaten earlier. His skin was horrifically charred. Black flakes of burnt skin occasionally fell off. It looked worse than when he had first developed The Thirst. He could only assume that crossing over the water had done this to him. It had not killed him, though, and it seemed to hold the other monster at bay.

He stumbled off into the rain while nursing his wounds. The Chomper continued its frustrated pacing, but paid no heed to the other entity. Dejan mentally dubbed the skeletal entity as a Savior, as that was all he could think of in his pain-addled state. Its searchlight eyes haunted him as he trudged home.

As time went on, he noted that he only ever saw one of them at a time, and only when it was raining. Wolf offered only a shrug when asked about it the next day. Dejan gave up on trying to find an explanation, and opted to just accept it as another part of the bizarre fauna living in these dark woods.


tldr: I wanted to make a suggestion for a monster that only shows up when it is raining. I also felt that another passive creature that is only dangerous situationally (similar to dogs who will leave you alone if you keep your distance) would be nice. It would be rather unnerving to be blind in the rain at night only to see lights from a source other than yourself suddenly appear.

I also defaulted to "Dejan" for the unnamed protagonist in the game. It seems like a fitting choice considering his situation.

- (Copy/pasted message ends here.)

So, I posted this short story (and a few others) as a suggestion for a new enemy type a while back on the Steam forums. I guess I am reposting it here because I would like the second opinion of the folks who frequent these boards, as well. Would a creepy, nonhostile creature who hangs out in the rain and poses a danger to both the player and other monsters add to the atmosphere?
Is it cold? If so, then I am content.

The Doctor
Posts: 18
Joined: Tue Nov 11, 2014 1:45 pm

Re: Dejan's Journal: Rainfall

Post by The Doctor » Wed Nov 26, 2014 6:06 am

Very nice story. I like how your expressed your suggestion in the form of a short narrative.

As for your actual suggestion, other passive creatures with unique abilities would present a welcome alternative to the completely hostile inhabitants of Darkwood. The presence of such creatures being dependent on environmental factors (raining, full moon, etc) is also a good idea and would add to the otherwise linear and repetitive forms of enemies.

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